Obituary of Brandon Boyle

Brandon Boyle, 37, passed away on Thursday May 20, 2021 in St. Catharines, Ontario. He is survived by his mother Margaret, Godmother Traci, sister Randi-Lee (Andrew), and his children Dylin, Baily, Damien, Brooklyn, and Olivia. He was predeceased by his grandmother Pearl, cousin Jason and his girlfriend Sunday. He will be missed dearly by extended family, aunts Cassie (Don) and Gail, uncles George (Gale), Raymond (Fran), David, Michael, and Brian, grandfather George, cousins Dennis (Tracy), Amber (Darryl), Sean, Justin (Devan), and Rose and nieces Teitia and Kasandra.

Brandon excelled at art, being featured in a museum. Brandon had a caring heart and a deep belief in God. We know that he is watching down on us from heaven.

Due to the current Covid restrictions, a private Celebration of Life will take place on Thursday, May 27, 2021 at 11 am. For those wishing to attend via livestream, please click the following link:  https://youtu.be/X6pHFquhl4E

 

Randi's Eulogy:

How do you sum up an entire life? How can I possibly say everything that I need to say? Brandon is my big brother, even though he has left this Earth he will always remain my big brother. The last few years haven’t been easy but that never meant I forgot about him or stopped loving him.

He had many challenges in his life but what never changed for him was that he loved his family and he had the biggest heart.

I hold my memories close and always have, because no matter how strained our relationship got, I never stopped thinking about my bother. Always hoping that one day we would be close again. That one day he would be able to come over and draw with his niece while they made fun of my poor drawing ability. Because it skipped me and I was always jealous of how easily drawing came to him.

Brandon helped me learn to walk (at least that’s what I’m told).

We played video games together starting with Mario and Sonic. Mom hated those games, she always said that it made her dizzy. But, when Resident Evil came out, she would actually let us play it on the big tv, without very much complaint because it was like watching a movie. Brandon played the hard parts, and he would always let me do the puzzle parts.

When we would go to my dad’s we always rented movies. He hated that I always picked an Ernest movie. One weekend he picked Chucky and it sparked my love of horror movies. Mom was livid! Brandon thought it was pretty funny.

When we were at my dad’s that also meant we were with our cousins. When we got together, we always had a so much fun, especially during Saturday morning cartoons. X-men was the favourite! And Brandon was always Wolverine when we would play it in the valley. Then we would go back to nana’s and find whatever yummy treats she had baked up. There was never a short supply of goodies.

Brandon taught me how to play Dungeons and Dragons. We would lay on his bunk beds and play for hours. Brandon was usually the dungeons master.

One Christmas we had a present for the both of us and it was the 13 Dead End Drive board game. We played that game all the time, it was so much fun.

Of course he was 4 years older than me which meant he became a teenager while I still wanted to keep playing board games. I was the ‘annoying little sister’ and he was too cool for me. Though we still had some moments of fun it wasn’t as often, but that’s how it is when you grow up.

Brandon loved animals and wanted a dog. My mom kept saying no, so one day he just brought Ludacris home. He knew that once mom saw him, she wouldn’t be able to resist. And so, we had a dog.

Years later he did it again! And we had Hennessey. She was such a sweet puppy but hated to be left alone.

Brandon had the biggest heart and shared his snacks with the girl that lived underneath us when she didn’t have snacks of her own. As an adult he gave away his shoes without a second thought because someone needed them. That’s who he was – a caring, loving person.

I wasn’t there for all of his children’s arrivals but I do remember some of them. I remember when Dylin was born, I was only 16 but was so excited to be an aunt. Brandon was so happy and couldn’t get enough of his baby boy. I remember when Baily was born too and he was excited for a little girl. She was a sweet little big-headed baby. Just like my big-headed brother.

Brandon tried so hard to deal with his mental health so he could be there for his kids. We all tried to help him to the best of our abilities but we aren’t the experts in the field. One Christmas break he stayed at my house; he was doing well but the demons that dwelled inside were too strong.

Silence in his head seemed to hurt him too much. Addiction is a horrible illness to live with and unfortunately as much as we wanted to help there was little anyone could do. He struggled for a long time.

Even through all of these struggles we loved him dearly. The hardest part of loving an addict is needing to love them from afar. Needing to give them tough love in hopes that they find their bottom so that they can then climb back out. And Brandon tried over and over again. That is part of the addiction process is trying to quit each and everyday. It isn’t like a broken arm that when it is fixed you can move on. It is a struggle that happens every minute of every day.

And I know that Brandon was finally coming to his bottom. He was getting support to apply and attend a treatment program. He was seeking the help that he so desperately needed. But God needed him home more than we needed him here. Having spoken with Brandon a few weeks ago I know that he had Jesus in his heart and I know that I will see him again in God’s kingdom.

I am happy that I was able to speak with him over the past few months. As much as at the time of the conversation we argued at least I had the chance to argue with him. What I wouldn’t give to be able to argue with my big brother again.

However, those moments aren’t the ones that I think of when I think of Brandon. I hope that you remember Brandon in the way that I remember him: As a person with the biggest heart, someone who wanted nothing more than to be with family, someone who tried to help others even when he needed help himself, someone who always thought of others.

 

Rob Henry's Eulogy:

 

1¶To everything there is a season,

A time for every purpose under heaven:

2A time to be born,

And a time to die;

A time to plant,

And a time to pluck what is planted;

3 A time to kill,

And a time to heal;

A time to break down,

And a time to build up;

4 A time to weep,

And a time to laugh;

A time to mourn,

And a time to dance;

5 A time to cast away stones,

And a time to gather stones; A time to embrace,

And a time to refrain from embracing;

6 A time to gain,

And a time to lose;

A time to keep,

And a time to throw away;

7 A time to tear,

And a time to sew; A time to keep silence,

And a time to speak;

8 A time to love,

And a time to hate;

A time of war,

And a time of peace.

I met Brandon just over a year ago in a rather  unique and peculiar way. I think more for Brandon then it was for me, either way, it was the beginning of a friendship that would last a couple years and be an opportunity and blessing for me to see how God could work in a heart like Brandon's.  A heart that many would think to be one that would never or could never change. 

 

Brandon seemed to be a very hard man on the outside and it was known by many that his reputation was that as a tough guy, but as I learned more about him and his journey, I identified with him as to why, because I was like him at a point in my life. I learned from Brandon that he had felt great shame and pain for all the wrongs he had done and the hurt he inflicted  to others , directly and indirectly. 

 

Brandon deeply cared for people because God had changed his heart. Did he have his life in perfect order , no, he struggled as we all do, with demons and chains that sometimes hold us captive in our desires to live for God and for good. 

 

It wasn't too long before I saw a hard heart be broken by the wonder working graceful hand of God.  Something happened  to Brandon in jail, long before I met him, all I can say is, I knew he met God and despite what many may have thought , he changed on the inside and it was trying hard to shine through on the outside. It was a beautiful sight to see as he tried so very hard to be a successful and productive , caring and compassionate citizen. 

 

Many may not have gotten close enough to see and hear his heart and the desires he had to change and transform his life so he could give back and help those who struggled as he did, but I did, and from his own lips. But what I heard more  importantly and most preciously,  over and over again, was from his own heart crying out . It was a beautiful  thing and a hope that kept him fighting for life and change. 

 

 Despite his struggles in this life up to the day I believe God took him home, Brandon had a heart after God , a heart to transform his own life and that of others. He wanted to open up a home to help those hopeless , hurting hearts like his, do bible studies and give back and help restore the lost hopeless states of many who were as he was. In fact this hard, bad man many knew him as, often carried his bible around and told me how so often God was speaking to him, and as a man of God , I could tell God had been talking to him. 

 

In closing, Brandon wanted to live and touch hearts like his had been. He carried much guilt and shame from his past for what he had done and this often set him back , but he knew as I often told him, your mess is not a waste, God  will use it and turn it into a miracle to change others, as he did mine .

  In fact,  recently Bradon applied to a 1 year program I had told him about,  a God centered program called  "Teen Challenge"  one that help to transform my life.

 

 Brandon really was trying and his heart really was changed ,please be encouraged that regardless of what many may think or have been told , I can honestly say getting close to Brandon the last 2 yrs , he was a different man . 

 

God comes to restore those whose lives are hopeless , hurting and in need of healing......  he did it for Brandon and myself , he can do it for all those who call upon His son, Jesus Christ. 

 

I am terribly grieved by your loss and my prayer is that you be comforted with peace and hope and healing by the one who comforted Brandon and that you please understand , Brandon was a changed man.

 It was indeed a beautiful and refreshing thing to see how God takes broken lost and hopeless men and saves , heals, rescues and restores them back to their destiny and God's designed purpose.

 

Thank you and my condolences for your loss.